3 Things lawyers need to know. About divorce.

1.  Validate

A client who feels supported is a better client.  It’s not all about the money (really).  Of course money provides much needed security and stability in the face of tremendous uncertainty but clients also need to experience genuine empathy in this early stage in the process. Start with validation, this must be very difficult for you, I can’t imagine what you’re going through, I’m so sorry you have to go through this.  

This may seem obvious and I know you’ve got your eye on the prize for the sake of the client, but taking the time to validate and affirm their experience at the outset will help them to feel supported and even better, begin to restore their sense of self.

2.  Break it Down

Again, obvious right?  But you need to remember that most client’s at this stage are still in a state of shock.  They're moving through their days on auto-pilot, often just trying to survive.  Keep it simple, break it down for them.  Remember, you’re the guide in this uncharted territory, this is where we’re headed, these are the two things I need you to take care of this week, how does that sound?  Check in often to see how they feel about the process.

3.  Provide Resources for Support

Let them know you really get it - that you understand that divorce is one of the most painful events they will EVER experience in their lifetime.  Provide meaningful resources for support including therapists, support groups, blogs, books, podcasts.  This is a time when client’s most need to feel connected.  Friends and family are often at a loss about how to best support them.  Real-time resources can make the difference between crushing isolation, and connection and hope for the future.